We just PCS'd to Washington state, and wow... living on post is completely different then I thought it would be. There are less friendly people, more larger then life people, and a lot more screaming children then I thought there would be. When I thought about living on a post (finally) after 2 years of living off post and away from my husband, I thought there would be more a sense of community, and of understanding. Perhaps you have to jump through hoops that the fellow milspouses put up to become part of this community. Maybe it's just this housing community. Or perhaps I'm not trying hard enough yet to find my niche here.
My baby turned 7 months old a few days ago. She's a constant amazement to me. My personality with her dad's looks... oh man.
Being away from home... meaning my old home where my family and friends live... hasn't been as hard as I think they wanted it to be. I do miss them, I miss driving somewhere and not getting lost, I miss having some one to babysit if I need an hour to just breathe. But I wanted to be away from them and from the things I knew there. I needed to be with my husband again after a year long training stint and then him going straight to Iraq, leaving me 9 weeks pregnant and dazed. I don't think anyone except for him ever knew how hard that was for me. I don't think I ever let any one try to understand.
Perhaps that's the pride of a military spouse. Taking pride in their suffering and their strength. Conveniently brushing off all those friends and family members who wish they could help you. I think we're very good at closing ourselves in, or at least our true feelings in and only projecting small bits of our joy or pain or whatever, just because we relish in the fact that the majority of people (meaning civilians) wouldn't be able to handle the lives that we live. Not true? I dunno..
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